Tag Archives: Monkeys

Monkey News: The Banana Derby

In Illinois the Banana Derby (a time-honored event where monkeys ride dogs like horses) has been catching flak, with people claiming it’s immoral to turn monkeys into jockeys. But do we really want to live in a country where county fairs don’t include simian cowboys? I know I don’t. Also featured: a cameo from Whiplash the read more »

Attack Monkeys, and Other Pets

Dogs and cats remain the most popular pets in the Western world. Dogs are furry and they love you unconditionally. Violin strings are made out of cat gut. Eventually I would like to get a couple of pet dogs, however in the meantime I fantasize about more exotic household critters. VELOCIRAPTORS Yes, I know, they read more »

The Greatest Zoo on Earth

Until recently if you asked me, “Mr. Heaton” (you do not have permission to call me by my Christian name) “What is the best zoo on the entire planet?” I would have responded with, “Why, Little River Zoo in Norman, Oklahoma.” Because Little River Zoo was populated entirely by animals rejected by better zoos. I read more »

I Will Take Your Excess Lab Monkeys

Joseph Robertson Jr., MD President OHSU 3181 SW Sam Jackson Park Rd. Portland, OR 97239-3098 Dear President Robertson, It has recently come to my attention that your university is employing monkeys in a series of tests researching the effects of nicotine on pregnant mothers. Like most Americans, the majority of my friends are in PETA, read more »