Category Archives: Politics

Political Satire ostensibly in the vein of P. J. O’Rourke.

Why Building a Wall is Beyond Stupid

I’m not proud of the fact that Donald Trump’s ridiculous protectionist rhetoric seems to irritate me more than anything else he does. Our new president contains multitudes of horrific policies, personal failings, and grammar shortcuts that a better person than me would overheat about first. Yet his moronic call for walls and tariffs hits a read more »

What to Expect at the Inauguration

Americans today celebrated the inauguration in a variety of ways, from fireworks and flag waving, to suicide attempts, to my own preference of watching the swearing in ceremony while playing old Twilight Zone episodes in the background so Rod Serling could kinda narrate everything. On this week’s episode of Mostly Weekly we decided to tackle the many read more »

Making the Rockettes Perform at the Inauguration

On this episode of Mostly Weekly we tackle the issue of the Radio City Rockettes being forced to perform at Trump’s inauguration, despite the fact that several of them would rather get root canals from a squirrel. It’s an interesting turn of events for public outrage. Freeing the Rockettes from performing at the coronation of read more »

Money News Around the World

Please tell the Pulitzer Prize committee to give me an award for doing an entire story not based on a Donald Trump tweet. Maybe a new category? In any case, the latest episode of Mostly Weekly explores money around the world, from Britain’s new vegan-friendly £5 note, to Venezuela where inflation is so rampant shopkeepers read more »

Fake Newsameggedon

One of the fun things about 2016 is that every week we get a fresh new Dire Threat to Civilization. In fact we could have made a pretty awesome wall calendar with a little foresight. This month, as folks in media struggle to figure out how we got everything so completely backwards in the 2016 election, we’ve sounded read more »

Globs of Optimism In Spite of the Election

Most of my liberal friends are still sitting Shiva for the ascent of Donald Trump and four years of rule from the new and improved Republican Reality Television Party. So I’d like to remind everyone that the 2016 Electionmageddan also had some terrific silver linings. In the latest Mostly Weekly we cover a few of read more »

The President Doesn’t Matter As Much As You Think

Worried about Trumpocalypse? Stop stockpiling your IUDs and investing in Spiked Bats! The truth is–the President can’t actually do as much as you probably think. And don’t worry- Congress is probably more inefficient than it is racist. Sooooo, yayyy!?  He can’t shuffle dissidents into FEMA camps or force us to read Twilight. He can’t declare read more »

First Reactions to the Trump Victory

It’s been over a week and Donald Trump still hasn’t admitted his campaign was a prank, so I think we have to accept this as reality. Like most cosmopolitan media elites and members of the Illuminati, I got this election completely wrong. How wrong? I bought stock in Smith & Wesson in preparation for a Clinton administration read more »

What the Hell is the Electoral College?

We are now about three years into the 2016 election and we’re down to the wire. Next week America selects its next president. So you’re about to hear a lot about the Electoral College. That’s why we’ve made a video explaining what the Electoral College is, and also, why it’s terrible and should be replaced. My read more »

Conscripted Candidates: An Update from Scandinavia

Take a break from this Dumpster Fire of an election! From the region of the world that brought you Bjork, Nobel Prices, and Neutrality, comes a new phenomenon: forced political service. A town in Norway elected a heavy metal rocker to city council… against his will. Nor-frickin-way. Iceland elected a comedian as Mayor. And I read more »

The IDK Candidate and Aleppogate

  In the latest installment of Mostly Weekly we explore libertarian candidate Gary Johnson’s geography gaffe, wherein the governor didn’t know what “Aleppo” was. (I personally thought that a “leppo” was one of those buzzy things you get at a restaurant to let you know your table is ready, but apparently it’s a city in Syria.) Then, read more »

Why American Trains Are So Slow

  I love trains and I think most folks do as well, so I was surprised to learn that we have slower and more expensive trains than we did in the 1930’s. Mobile phones used to be large gray bricks, but now I can fit six or seven of them in my pocket as I leave the gym every read more »

None of the Above Option

I use Lovecraftian monsters and a dead gorilla in this episode of Mostly Weekly to illustrate why every ballot in America should have “None of the Above” listed as a candidate. We didn’t have time to include the last Staten Island congressional election in the video, although it’s a perfect example of when a None Of The Above option would have read more »

FDA Launches App Competition for Opioid Addiction

I’m not normally a big fan of the Food and Drug Administration. If you’re an FDA bureaucrat and you’re told there’s a promising new drug that might cure a disease, but there’s a small chance people will die from side effects, you have more personal incentive to veto it than approve it. (No one is going to read more »

A Dozen Eggs Cost $150 in (Socialist) Venezuela

One of the horrors Bernie Sanders unleashed on America during his campaign is screwing up the definition of “socialism” for an entire generation of college students. Socialism is the public ownership of the means of production. Unfortunately now whole swaths of rank-and-file Bern victims think socialism means “cute Nordic countries.” Sweden and Denmark have high taxes read more »

Star Trek: The Libertarian Edition

It’s Star Trek’s Fiftieth Anniversary! To celebrate half a century of terrific science fiction I teamed up with the good folks at Reason to make “Star Trek: The Libertarian Edition.” It turns out when Reason wants a funny person with boundless depths of sci-fi knowledge, I’m on the shortlist. In fact my pervasive knowledge of Star Trek is a little read more »

Is Kim Kardashian Advertising or Not?

Apparently there is growing concern at the Federal Trade Commission about celebrities promoting goods and services via social media. If Kim Kardashian receives comped nights at a tony Airbnb apartment, and Instagrams how great the company is, should she include #ad to let hapless consumers know her torrent of social media may be self-interested? It’s a situation which read more »

Pakistan’s Largest City to be Run by Imprisoned Mayor

Karachi is Pakistan’s largest city, and the guy it’s about to elect ran afoul of the military regime which runs the country. So he’ll be democratically elected as mayor, but will do so from prison, where he’s serving a sentence for any number of charges. To put this in perspective, Karachi has twenty million people. read more »

Japan’s Emperor Wants to Abdicate; May Not Be Able To

Japan’s Emperor Akihito has hinted at wanting to abdicate (the royal version of retiring, except with more money and less Florida), but it turns out he may not be able to. The Japanese constitution has no legal mechanism by which an emperor can abdicate. This isn’t some frilly quirk of history quite like our European friends, read more »

The Republican National Convention

  It’s the RNC, with a star studded list of people who WONT be attending! Donald Trump, the PT Barnum of American politics has chosen as his running mate, noted human tube sock and Indiana governor Mike Pence. How did it all come to this? WATCH OR I WILL STRANGLE THIS POKEMON WITH A HAMMER. read more »