I’m not proud of the fact that Donald Trump’s ridiculous protectionist rhetoric seems to irritate me more than anything else he does. Our new president contains multitudes of horrific policies, personal failings, and grammar shortcuts that a better person than me would overheat about first. Yet his moronic call for walls and tariffs hits a nerve, and we cover that in the latest episode of Mostly Weekly. We slather jokes all over the wall’s absurd cost, and the deplorable methods by which Trump aims to pay for it. (And that’s not even diving into the rampant xenophobia surrounding Mexican immigrants, or the absurdly minimal effects the boondoggle would actually impose on immigration.)
I think what needles me is that protectionism isn’t really up for debate. Even left-wing carbuncles like Paul Krugman acknowledge low tariffs and a global economy are a net boon to its participants. Republicans spent the last fifty years championing free market capitalism over tariffs and closed economies. Now Republicans have cratered on an issue they should be proud of.
Nowadays most American acknowledge that if Bob wants to have sex with Jose, that’s their business. But weirdly, if Bob wants to employ Jose for his business, all these knuckle-draggers come out with bricks and hand trowels. Bah!
Andrew Heaton is a writer and standup comedian in New York City. If this post made you laugh or think, kindly "like" it on Facebook.